Second Epistle of John

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New Testament
Chapter 1

1 Teh grownz up, to da prettyz cat and kittehs. I luv dems truthly and everyones is luving dems truthly.2 Cuz we alls gots da trooth.3 Good cat skillz is being ours from teh Ceiling Cat and Jebus (Ceiling Cats's kitteh).

4 Oh hai! U is truthly too? Yay! Ceiling Cat is can be happies now.5 Prettees kitteh, where is teh luvs?6 Ceiling Cat is has can tellings we's to lovez!

7 Teh meanies nots liking Jebus is everywheres! Dey is being not goodz.8 Beware dems so you is can keeps yur cheezeburgers and gets mores!9 Lotz of kittehs being mizzing outs.10 Dey is comings and tryyings to steals yours cheezeburgers! No lets dems in!11 If yous is letting tehm ins, u's is noes goods eitehr.

12 Dere is too much to sayz and hoomans is not havings enuf paperz. Can us be is seeings each otehr soonz? kthx bai.13 oh... sister'z kittehs sayz hai.

Second Epistle of John
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