From LOLCat Bible Translation Project
Teh Song By Asaf
1 Teh mytee Ceiling Cat speekz to an sumuns teh Urf and teh uvva kittehs, frum teh sun cummin up to teh sunset, Srsly.
2 Frum teh Matrix, purrfect in booty, teh Cieling Cat Gloes.
3 Teh Ceiling Cat will beh cummin, and he wnt shup; uh fiyer eats afor him, and he iz in uh Storm.
4 Teh Ceiling Cat will make teh ceiling and teh urf come, Srsly, so tht he can watch teh uvva kittehs always.
5 He sed "Cum here my speshul kittehs, who pwomessed meh stuff by killin teh mices."
6 And teh Ceiling says tat Ceiling Cat is rite, cuz teh Ceiling Cat himselfs is teh judge, Cheezbrger.
7 Listen to meh kittehs! Cos ai iz gunna speek kittehs, and ai will testuhfai agaynst yooh!
8 Ai iz not gunnah shout a yooh kittehs fur yor sackriffisez or fur yor buhnt offrins what yooh alwayz gives meh.
9 Ai dunt want yor kows or yor horny beard kittehs frum yor howses.
10 Cuz ai alreddy haz all teh animulz in teh woodz, and all of teh cows on uh fowzand hillz
11 Ai'z frendz wiv orl of teh burdees in teh mowntins and teh creechers of teh feeld iz mine
12 If ai wuz hungree, ai woodnt tell yooh, ai would eet cheezbrgrz for ai can haz cheezbrgrz, and all tat is in dem
13 Do Ceiling cat eat teh skinz of kowz? or drinks teh blud of teh horny beardy kittehs?
14 Fank meh by killin teh d00ds like yooh pwomessed meh yooh wood, Srsly.
15 Ask meh for halpz when yooh wants it, ai will halp yooh, and yooh will return teh fayva
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