Job 16

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Old Testament
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Job Sez

1 An then Job says,

2 I knows all teh things you be sayin already! Youz FAIL at comfurtin dis kitteh!

3 Why waste ur breath tellen me wut are haz no meaning! Why you be all, liek, attack'n me an stuffs?

4 I mean, if I wuz you an you wuz me, I could totally pwn you all, rite hear rite now,

5 but I iz never ever gunna do that. I would bez all liek helpin youz an stuffs. For reals!

6 I iz gonna be hurtin liek dis evn if I bez explainin an letten it out an stuff, or bein quiet, so tellin evryone my feelins doesn't fix dis kitteh.

7 Ceilin Cat be breakin me down!

8 I iz as skinny as a kitteh who haz nevr had teh cheeseburger, not even once!

9 Its liek teh ceilin cat be chewin' on me!

10 An all teh other kittehs keep on starin at me liek I iz a show!

11 Ceiling Cat is lettin them do it!

12 I used to have cheeseburgers, but now he keeps breakin me down!

13 Liek he wuz huntin' for me, or sumthin liek dat, and now he got me!

14 He is teh pwner!

15 An now I iz jus playin' dead.

16 Too many tears fr dis kitteh.

17 But I iz innocent!

18 Evn teh urf might not haz a place fr me! No one can here me!

19 Teh Ceiling Cat can here me, is all.

20 Muh freindz be liek makin fun, an I has tears.

21 I wish a kitteh would come an tell Ceiling Cat about me.

22 I think I iz gunna be in da grave soon.


Job 16
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