From LOLCat Bible Translation Project
Ceiling Cat iz no pleezd
1 Oh hai, me Ceiling Cat sez to u, Israel guise: Ceiling Cat iz no happy, u maked me a cookie an u eated it, no srsly.2 An u swer, lie, an do teh killz, an teh stealz an u cheatin on ur gf's OMG!!1!!3 Iz so pissed dat u has no moar foodz fer u, an no watur, an no petz, an no buttsecs, an no nuffin.
4 Ur grounded. Srsly.
5 Cuz ur bad, ai was be sayin "iz it can be buttsecs an then u die teim" to ur mum.
6 An also: mai kittehs has no Internetz, wai? coz u evil ppl sai DO NOT WANT, so ai sai stfu NO U! an u go to hell an u will has Win Vista forevr7 cuz teh moar u were, teh badder u were: i gun get u bad, i gun get ur laif flippd turnd upsied down.8 An no moar cheezburgrz fer u.
11 Yez, u was all down bitchin pimpin an moar bitchez. An wine. It was nevar Ceiling Cat tiem.12 U bitchez.13 Goed bitchin an pimpin on teh sofaz, on teh treez, on teh beachez an teh streetz, cuz u like surprise buttsecs an u r hurny liek mad rabbits.14 But, if ur gf's or daughtahs becoem bitchez, Iz cool wif it. If u r not, u gonna go down.
16 Can it be napperz teim nao?
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