Philemon 1

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Greetz

1 O hai Philemon, iz Paul n mai bro Timothy.

2 N hai 2 Apphia and Archippus. N 2 evrywun.

3 May Ceiling Cat gib u many Cheezburgerz.

Philemons luv

4 I tol Ceiling Cat bout u wen I wuz prayin.5 I biggid u up. Srsly.6 I hopez ur faiths is goode becuz u sees teh goode stuffs we can maek fore teh Ceiling Cat.7 Ur luff n 'currigment maeks me LOL, becuz teh hartz uf teh saynts is moar bettr, k mah brudder?

Paul Axes Phil 2 b nice to Onesimius

8 So u no I's not skared of makin u do stuff, rite?9 But U shuld do teh stuffs becuz I (BTW: I iz Paul; I iz teh olde an i iz prizner for Christ) luffs u.10 I iz does tihs becuz uf Onesimus, him iz liek mah kidz.11 Him wuz teh n00b, but naow he haz teh uses and can does teh stuffs.12 I sendz him--him mah hartz!--2 u naow, k?13 I lieks him 2 b wif me, becuz he can do teh stuffs insted uf u becuz I iz prizner14 but I duznt lieks do teh stuffs taht maeks u sez "Do not want!"15 Idk, mebbe him iz gon so taht him can be bak l8r?16 Ha! Hiz not ur slave, hiz liek teh brudder, kinda fore me and a lotz fore u, he iz srsly brudder and invisible brudder.

17 So u giv Onesimus cheezburgr. Fries too, laik u giv me, k?18 Honest, I pay for cheezburgr.19 Srlsy, I willz! I mean, u owe me rite?20 Can has a bukkit of pepsy 2? Kthx.

21 I knoes taht u will does what i sez an moar. U rock!22 BTW: I mite comes and lives wif u guys l8r.

Phinal Greetz

23 Epaphras iz prizner too. He sez "Oh hai."24 Mark, Aristarchus, Demas, and Luke sez "Oh hai."

25 Cheez! Kthxbai.

Philemon 1
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