Da Apawsals Creed

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Teh Apawsalz Creeded iz wun uv deh earliest statements uv belief in da Ceiling Cat. Srsly. It b putteded together ta tri adn stawpz de laiz uv teh Gnossticks. Theerz awr a rly old story dat sez each uv dai twelv Apawsalz wroteded part uv eet. Cuz uv dis catz haz uzually spleeted eet up intwos twelv partz.

I beweivez in Ceiling Cat, teh Fathr Almitey,
the makr uv de ceiling and de floor,
adn in Happy Cat, hiz ownlee Son, awr Lord:
Hoo wuz conceived by da Hover Cat,
Born ov teh virgn Mary,
Suffered undah Pontiuz Pilate,
waz crucifid, ded, adn burid;
He descendeded into teh basement.
Teh threeth dai him roes out of teh basement
He climbd into teh Ceiling
adn he sitted awn teh riet paw uv Ceiling Cat teh fathur Almitey;
frum theerz him whil com ta judge the quik adn teh ded.
I beweivez in da Hover Cat;
teh holy catlick church;
teh sharin cookies wit da speshul catz;
teh foargiveness uv invizible errorz;
teh resurrecshun uv teh bodai;
adn teh lief everlassin.
Amen
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