Amos 2

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Old Testament
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1 Ceiling Cat sed: these peeplez are bad. Moab is on timez out.

2 i's is profeshunal berner nowz.

3 i's is also dais some moar, Ceiling Cat sed.

4 Ceiling Cat sed: Judah you is bad toos, you ignorez Ceiling Cat, nd bow tew dem fake Ceiling Cat stachooz. yuo is on punishment.

5 bernz.

6 Ceiling Cat sed: Izrale you too!? Why you sellz shooz? You is on punishment.

7 Why you makes hobos derty, and steels wimps moneys? Whyz you an ur dad has buttsecks on same harbl?

8 You is sleeps on cherch, and getz drunks even when you has not a hard day.

9 i's tolds you about the Amorite berns?

10 i's gave you this lands form Egypt?

11 i's mades you strawng boyz. O rly, Izrale? Sed Ceiling Cat.

12 But you donts carez, you just drunks, and says no tells.

13 So now I's feels konstipaiteds.

13 i's gonna makes yuo on such a punishment!

13 you's will has invisible clumzies, nothing werks.

14 Only if you has kerudge, then you can runs nakid, sed Ceiling Cat.

Amos 2
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