From LOLCat Bible Translation Project
1 In teh dayz of judges, therez no cheezbrgrz. Dood from Bethlehem (dat in Judah) is has wife 'n too boi kittehs and leave for Moab.2 Man is Elimelech. Wife iz Naomi. Boi kittehs names don't matter, they dies soon anways lolz. They livez in Moab now.
3 Elimelech dies, Naomi is widowe. Still gots two boi kittehs.4 Boi kittehs has gots wives now, Orpah n' Ruth. Family livs in Moab for tene yers and5 Boi kittehs dies lolz. Naomi now widowe with no kittehs.
8 Naomi sez "Kthx, but yuz go home to yur momz. May teh Ceiling Cat give all of you happy 'n stuff as yous have shown yours dead n' me.9 "May Ceiling Cat givez you will finds sleeps n' more mens 'n stuffs, kthxbye." She kised thems and all cried lolz.10 And said to herz "We gos bak wit yuz." "Don't hurt your lamp, Ruth" said F. Zappa
11 But Naomi sez "Nos! Go homez, lolz. Why yu comes? I am haves no more suns for yu to be wivezes.12 "Goes home... I too old 'n stuff for more husbands. There is no hopes for me to has sunz.13 "Even ifs, sunz be lil kittehs 'n not able to get marryed for long times lol. Bad times for me, not as bad for you since Ceiling Cat hates mes and kills all my husband n' sonz."
14 All crys. Orpah kisess Naomi 'n gos home like good doter. Ruth not leeves.
15 "Look"(Naomi keep talks)"yus sister gos home to her peeples n' gods. Go with teh flowz!"
16 Ruth sez "Nos. Where yu goes, I gos n' where yu stay, me too. Yus peeples mine 'n yus Ceiling Cat mine too kthx.17 "I dies where yu dies, n' there i is being dead. May teh Ceiling Cat killz me, deaths is all that wills separated us."18 Naomi sees Ruth. Stops meow. They goes.
19 Thems has gots to Bethlehem. Town sez "Is this teh Naomis?"
20 "I not Naomi" sez Naomi. "I is called Mara (which means icky n' not very tasteh), becuz Ceiling Cat is mean and mak my life very bad.21 "I gos out full wit husband n' sunz 'n stuff, but now i gots none. Whi calls me Naomi (which meanses good 'n stuff)? Ceiling Cat can has afflicted mes."
22 So anyways they all gets back to Bethlehem from Moab and it wuz times to has barleys.
|← Previous||Next →||← Previous||Next →|
|Judges||1 Samuel||Judges 21||Ruth 2|