Ruth 1

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{{verse
{{verse
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|3=Elimelech dies, Naomi is widowe. Still gots two boi kittehs.
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|3=Elimelech dieded, Naomi alonez but still gots two boi kittehs.
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|4=Boi kittehs has gots wives now, Orpah n' Ruth. Family livs in Moab for tene yers and
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|4=Boi kittehs haz marriedz two kittehs, Orpah n' Ruth. Family livs in Moab for tene yers and
|5=Boi kittehs dies lolz. Naomi now widowe with no kittehs.
|5=Boi kittehs dies lolz. Naomi now widowe with no kittehs.
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{{verse
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|6=She hears that Ceiling Cat help his pepples by givin thems cakes n' pies n' cheezebrgrs kthx. Naomi is gets grrl kittehs n' goes bak to Israel.
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|6=She hears that Ceiling Cat help his pepples by givin thems cakes n' pies n' cheezebrgrs kthx. Naomi is gets grrl kittehs an goes bak to Israel.
|7=Thems all leave home on the roadz to teh Judahs.
|7=Thems all leave home on the roadz to teh Judahs.
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|8=Naomi sez "Kthx, but yuz go home to yur momz. May teh Ceiling Cat give all of you happy 'n stuff as yous have shown yours dead n' me.
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|8=Naomi sez "Kthx, but yuz go home to yur momz. May teh Ceiling Cat givez cheezburger an stuff as yous givded cheezburger to daed kittehs an me.
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|9="May Ceiling Cat givez you will finds sleeps n' more mens 'n stuffs, kthxbye." She kised thems and all cried lolz.
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|9="May Ceiling Cat givez yew will finds sleeps n' more mens 'n stuffs, kthxbai." She kised thems and all cried lolz.
|10=And said to herz "We gos bak wit yuz."
|10=And said to herz "We gos bak wit yuz."
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{{verse
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|11=But Naomi sez "Nos! Go homez, lolz. Why yu comes? I am haves no more suns for yu to be wivezes.
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|11=But Naomi sez "Nos! Go homez, lolz. Y yu comes? Ai am haves no more sunz for yu to be wivezes.
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|12="Goes home... I too old 'n stuff for more husbands. There is no hopes for me to has sunz.
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|12="Goez homez, I too old 'n stuff for moar kittehs. I r oldcat LOL an Iz not haz huzbnd
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|13="Even ifs, sunz be lil kittehs 'n not able to get marryed for long times lol. Bad times for me, not as bad for you since Ceiling Cat hates mes and kills all my husband n' sonz."
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|13="Evn ifs, sunz be lil kittehs an not abel tew get maryeed for yeers lol. Yew not waitz haz secks til new kittehs r big! Iz will mis yew butz Ceiling Cat haz not givez me cheezburgerz kthxbai."
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{{verse
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|14=All crys. Orpah kisess Naomi 'n gos home like good doter. Ruth not leeves.
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|14=All crys. Orpah kisess Naomi 'n gos home lak gud doter. Ruth not leeves.
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|15="Look"(Naomi keep talks)"yus sister gos home to her peeples n' gods. Go with teh flowz!"
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|15="Lewk"(Naomi keep talks)"yur sister gos home to her kittehs n' stuff. Go with teh flowz!"
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|16=Ruth sez "Nos. Where yu goes, I gos n' where yu stay, me too. Yus peeples mine 'n yus Ceiling Cat mine too kthx.
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|16=Ruth sez "Noes, Ai not goez; yu can't maek meh LOL.  Ai foloz yu an slepe nex tew yu. Yur kittehs r mine an yur Ceiling Cat mine tew kthx.
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|17="I dies where yu dies, n' there i is being dead. May teh Ceiling Cat killz me, deaths is all that wills separated us."
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|17="Ai diez wif you, n' there i is being dead. May teh Ceiling Cat killz me if Ai leev yew b4 we iz daed."
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|18=Naomi sees Ruth. Stops meow. They goes.
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|18=Naomi sez OK coz Ruth iz desidedz. Doez not meow moar.
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|19=Thems has gots to Bethlehem. Town sez "Is this teh Naomis?"
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|19=Thems haz gots to Bethlehem. Town iz eksyted. Wimmens in town sez "Iz yew teh Naomi?"
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|20="I not Naomi" sez Naomi. "I is called Mara (which means icky n' not very tasteh), becuz Ceiling Cat is mean and mak my life very bad.
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|20="Ai not Naomi ne moar" sez Naomi. "I is nao Mara (which means icky n' not very tasteh), becuz Ceiling Cat is mean and mak my life very bad an didz not givez me cheezburgerz.
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|21="I gos out full wit husband n' sunz 'n stuff, but now i gots none. Whi calls me Naomi (which meanses good 'n stuff)? Ceiling Cat can has afflicted mes."
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|21="Ai gos out full wit husband n' sunz 'n cookiez stuff, but now ai gots none. Y callz meh Naomi (wich meanses good 'n stuff)? Ceiling Cat haets meh nao LOL."
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{{verse
{{verse
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|22=So anyways they all gets back to Bethlehem from Moab and it wuz times to has barleys.
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|22=So anyways dey all gets bak to Bethlehem fromz Moab an it wuz timez to has barleys.
[[Category:Ruth|Ruth 1]]
[[Category:Ruth|Ruth 1]]
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{{Bottom Bar|NextBook=[[1 Samuel]]|PrevBook=[[Judges]]|NextChap=[[Ruth 2]]|PrevChap=[[Judges 21]]}}
{{Bottom Bar|NextBook=[[1 Samuel]]|PrevBook=[[Judges]]|NextChap=[[Ruth 2]]|PrevChap=[[Judges 21]]}}

Revision as of 12:22, 28 July 2009

Old Testament
Bible5.gif

1 In teh dayz of judges, therez no cheezbrgrz. Dood from Bethlehem (dat in Judah) is has wife 'n too boi kittehs and leave for Moab.2 Man is Elimelech. Wife iz Naomi. Boi kittehs names don't matter, they dies soon anways lolz. They livez in Moab now.

3 Elimelech dieded, Naomi alonez but still gots two boi kittehs.4 Boi kittehs haz marriedz two kittehs, Orpah n' Ruth. Family livs in Moab for tene yers and5 Boi kittehs dies lolz. Naomi now widowe with no kittehs.

6 She hears that Ceiling Cat help his pepples by givin thems cakes n' pies n' cheezebrgrs kthx. Naomi is gets grrl kittehs an goes bak to Israel.7 Thems all leave home on the roadz to teh Judahs.

8 Naomi sez "Kthx, but yuz go home to yur momz. May teh Ceiling Cat givez cheezburger an stuff as yous givded cheezburger to daed kittehs an me.9 "May Ceiling Cat givez yew will finds sleeps n' more mens 'n stuffs, kthxbai." She kised thems and all cried lolz.10 And said to herz "We gos bak wit yuz."

11 But Naomi sez "Nos! Go homez, lolz. Y yu comes? Ai am haves no more sunz for yu to be wivezes.12 "Goez homez, I too old 'n stuff for moar kittehs. I r oldcat LOL an Iz not haz huzbnd13 "Evn ifs, sunz be lil kittehs an not abel tew get maryeed for yeers lol. Yew not waitz haz secks til new kittehs r big! Iz will mis yew butz Ceiling Cat haz not givez me cheezburgerz kthxbai."

14 All crys. Orpah kisess Naomi 'n gos home lak gud doter. Ruth not leeves.

15 "Lewk"(Naomi keep talks)"yur sister gos home to her kittehs n' stuff. Go with teh flowz!"

16 Ruth sez "Noes, Ai not goez; yu can't maek meh LOL. Ai foloz yu an slepe nex tew yu. Yur kittehs r mine an yur Ceiling Cat mine tew kthx.17 "Ai diez wif you, n' there i is being dead. May teh Ceiling Cat killz me if Ai leev yew b4 we iz daed."18 Naomi sez OK coz Ruth iz desidedz. Doez not meow moar.

19 Thems haz gots to Bethlehem. Town iz eksyted. Wimmens in town sez "Iz yew teh Naomi?"

20 "Ai not Naomi ne moar" sez Naomi. "I is nao Mara (which means icky n' not very tasteh), becuz Ceiling Cat is mean and mak my life very bad an didz not givez me cheezburgerz.21 "Ai gos out full wit husband n' sunz 'n cookiez stuff, but now ai gots none. Y callz meh Naomi (wich meanses good 'n stuff)? Ceiling Cat haets meh nao LOL."

22 So anyways dey all gets bak to Bethlehem fromz Moab an it wuz timez to has barleys.

Ruth 1
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