Revelation 17

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New Testament
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Teh h00kr an her BFF - teh monstah

1 Wun of teh sevn hovr d00dz (teh wunz wif teh bowlz) was liek "O hai, see teh punishmint of teh big h00kr who sitz on all teh bathtubz."2 All teh kingz had harblez wif her n evribody gotted drunk from dem."

3 Teh hovr d00d pickt me up bai teh scruffz of mai neck n taked me to teh dezrt. A womn wuz sittin on a red monstr wif drti wurdz rittn all ovr it. It hadded seven hedz n ten hornz.4 The womn was warin purpl n red, plus joolz. Her cup wuz full of nasti stuffz.5 "Mistri, Babylon teh Grate, Mama of h00krz n nasti stuffz" was rited on her forhed.6 She wuz drunk on teh blood of teh saintz. I wuz realli freekt.

7 Teh hovr d00d sez "U is freekt why? I explainz to u.8 Teh monstr izint real yet. Latr it comz from teh Abyss n getz pwnded. Evribodi whoz aroun then getz freekt."

9 Be smoart. Teh sevn headz are seven hillz n teh womn sitz on dem.10 O yeh n also dey is sevn kingz. Five fallded. Wun haznt fallded n wun haznt evn comed. But when he duz he wil stai a bit.11 Teh monstr iz teh eighth king. He belongz to teh otherz n will get pwnded liek I sez."

12 Teh ten hornz is ten moar kingz. Dey doan haff kingdmz but dey will be kingz for wun hour each. Liek makin fotoz LOL.13 Dey dont do much tho, just give powr to teh monstr.14 Dey wil fiet a war aginst teh babi sheep n looz LOL. Teh babi sheep is Lord of lorz n King of kingz n he will haff all his d00dz wif him.

15 O yeh n teh bafwaterz is lots of peeplz.16 Teh monstr n teh ten hornz will hate teh h00kr. Dey wil taek her clothez n eat her n set her on fier.17 Dat wuz Ceiling Cat's idea.18 Teh womn is teh graet citi dat r00lz all teh kingz."

Revelation 17
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