From LOLCat Bible Translation Project
1 Lyk WHY do u purr cuz of teh ebil, u mighty kitteh? Why do u purr all day long--teh disgrace of teh eyez of teh Ceiling Cat u is nao!2 U tongue, it be plotting teh destructionz; it be like a sharpened kitteh claw, u who be plotting to steal teh bukkitz.3 U luv teh pooches (EBIL, lol) an not teh kittehs (GUD, plz); fakerz an not saying teh truthz.4 In ur kitteh haertz, u has luv for teh ebilness. O, u has a bad tongue!5 U no Ceiling Cat be punting u down to ruin; he will use u as teh baad scratching post an he will taer u from ur litterbox an he will put u in teh lair of teh pooches!6 Teh gud kittehs will see an be afraid! They will laff in at him, seyz,7 "Here be teh kitteh who think he is teh l33t--too l33t for teh Ceiling Cat; he lyked his catnip better than teh Ceiling Cat! He be scratching others an getting strongerz."8 But I be lyke a blooburry bush an I be flourishin' in teh ceiling fan of teh Ceiling Cat; I putz mah trust in Ceiling Cat's unfailing luvz an I purr his praises forevr and evr.9 I lift up mah catnip an praizes forevr for wut u has doen for mah life! In ur name I be hoping an I will praize u in teh presence of teh holi kittehs!
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