Psalm 49

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Old Testament
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1 Heer dis all yu kittehz: lisen up eberybody!

2 bof rich kittehz an poor kittehz da saem:

3 Smart wordz com outta mah mouf; da speakenz ob mah hart will maek uderstandenz.

4 I'z heerz a proverb nao; wiff mah harpz ai tellz yu a riddelz.

5 Y shud ai be ascared wen ebil daiz com, wen da lyen kittehz r all ober meh.

6 Dose kittehs hoo tink deh haz all dat, an r all liek "luk at all mah monehz!"

7 No kitteh can gib anoffer kitteh deir lief bak, or gib Ceiling Cat monehz 4 it-

8 da monehz neaded 2 bai a life is liek, alot, an no monehz is eber enoff-

9 dat him shud lib foreber an no get old an yuky lukin.

10 cuz eberybody gotsta get ded. Da smart kittehz, and da dum kittehs get ded an leeb deir monehz 2 oder kittehz.

11 Deir tooms will b deir howses foreber, dey will lib dere foreber eben doe dey naemded stuffs after dem.

12 Da kitteh still gets ded eben doe him gotz monehz, jus liek da crawlies.

13 Dis wat happenz 2 kittehs hoo doos deir own fing an dose dat folloes dem.

14 liek da shepes dey is gonna get ded and deff will nom on dem. Da gud kittehs will rool ober dem in da mornens; dey will get yucky in deir grabes, far away from da pretteh howses.

15 But Ceiling cat will get mah life bak from da grabe; him will bwing meh to hang owt wiff him.

16 Du nawt tink is kewl wen a kitteh gets da monehz an him howse gets biggr.

17 cuz him can't hab it wen he get ded. It nawt go wiff him.

18 doe he wuz liek 'I'z reeleh kewl' an da kittehs wuz liek 'yay! U doinz gud!'

19 him still get ded like him daddeh cats hoo don lib nomoar.

20 Dum kitteh hoo gots da monehz is lieks da crawlies dad get ded.

Psalm 49
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