Proverbs 28

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Old Testament
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1 Teh bad kittehs runz an haidz, eben if iz not baff tiem;
Teh gud kittehs sayz "o hai" lotz an meow big liek lions.

2 If teh howse iz bad, all hoomans an kittehs trai 2 fix it but onlee smrt kitteh maeks howse gud.

3 A bad kitteh taht hurts teh lil kittehs iz liek storm wif big flashy laits an lowd noise taht maeks cheezburgers runz awai.

4 Kitteh taht maeks bad stufz an sayz bad werds iz n trubil Gud kittehs werk 4 Ceiling Cat an git all cheezburgers.

5 Ebil kittehs DO NOT WANT fair;
Ceiling Cat's kittehs liek fair an do it lotz.

6 Betur a kitteh haz lil bit o kitteh toyz an be gud dan be bad kitteh wif lotz of toyz.

7 Be gud kittehs to yer mahm an dadcat;
olwaiz do wut Ceiling Cat sayz, an be BFFs wif gud kittehs.

8 if yu ebil yu git all cheezburgers an kittehs toyz u wantz, but noder kitteh will givz it 2 teh kittehs wif none.

9 Kittehs dat do bad stuffs and donut obey teh laws of ceiling cat, der wishes for cheezburgrs will nevr cums tru.

10 Kittehs hoo makes oder kittehs do ebil stuffs will b lockd up in kittehbox fur olways but de kittehs hoo do ebil fur him an not no it will get lots of toyz and cheezeburgers.

11 Kittehs wif lots of toyz an cheezburgers may tink dey smrt but kittehs wif littl toyz and cheezburgers hoo have not arroganse of kitteh wif lots can see dat lots of stuffs not make u smrt srsly.

12 Wen rychuss kittehz b praizin teh ceiling cat an be all liek 'oh hai we iz luvin yu olwaiz grayshuss ceiling cat' evrywan b happi but wen kittehz b praizin ebil floor cat an b all liek 'oh hai ebil floor cat we luvs yu an not ceiling cat' den ceiling cat iz haiding an nowan iz happi evur agen.

13 If yu iz pretendin yu iz not doin bad stuffs ceiling cat will see yu newaiz an no an he taik all yur cheezburgerz an toyz but if yu iz sayin 'oh hai ceiling cat I iz soree i iz peein on sohfa an I iz soree fo sayin teh meen fings' den ceiling cat be liek 'I furgivz yu an now yu can has kthxbai'

14 Be fraid ov teh rath of teh ceiling cat - it b grait srsly - den yu be happi but if yu be liek 'oh ceiling cat he a nOOb' den yu dai an go liv wif teh ebil floor cat.

15 Ebil kings DO NOT WANT k

16 wen prinsez iz dum dey peepelz b sad an po' but if prinsez b olwaiz huntin teh nollegez den dey peepelz olwaiz has lots of cheezburgerz

17 kitteh hoo iz hurten teh uver kittehz be goin to hellz - srsly!!!

18 do wat ceiling cat sez an if yu iz evur gettin stuck in waterz (DO NOT WANT ) he iz saivin yu! but if yu iz bad kitteh he iz maikin yu taik baffs evrydai forevur!SRSLY

19 Werk hard an yu have lots of cheezburgerz k? but if yu iz moar inchrested in lookin pritti den yu be po' foh olwaiz! Srsly

20 beleev in ceiling cat he giv yu nise fings but if yu olwaiz lukin for teh cheezburgerz an nevur cairin bout nufin else yu olwaiz be po' k?

21 If yu iz liekin wan ov yur kittnz betur dan teh uverz dis not gud coz uverz will do bad fingz to trai maek yu liek dem.

22 kitteh hoo b ebil an olwaiz lukin for teh cheezburgerz he b olwaiz a po kitteh but if yu iz halpin teh po kittehz hoo iz havin no cheez wif der burgerz den yu hav gud lief srsly!

23 If yu olwaiz nise to kittehz eben wen dey iz bad dey not respek yu but if yu iz korektin dem wen dey iz doin rong dey be all liek 'oh thx'

24 if yu steeled nefing frum yur mama r papakitteh an iz sayin 'oh hai it b okai cawz day is mah famlee' yu be rong an ceiling cat punish yu!

25 if yu olwaiz finkin yu betur dan uver kittehs yu be gettin in faits but if yu iz trustin in teh ceiling cat he maek yu rich srsly!

26 don b finkin yu olwaiz rait - yu not! wauk wif ceiling cat an he keep yu saif!

27 givz sum cheezburgerz to teh po peepelz an yu b okai but if yu iz haidin an pertendin not to see no po peepelz den peepels callz yu meen naimz! Srsly!

28 if ebil kitteh maek hizself king all teh gud kittehz b haiden but wen he dai den dey com bak an haz big parti!

Proverbs 28
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