Nehemiah 4

From LOLCat Bible Translation Project

Revision as of 22:46, 16 November 2010 by Jockeys (Talk | contribs)
(diff) ← Older revision | Latest revision (diff) | Newer revision → (diff)
Jump to: navigation, search
Old Testament
Bible5.gif

1 so Sanballat hurded taht we wuz rebldng teh wall, he wuz liek srsly pizzed. He trolled teh Jew-kitteh,

2 an so wif hiz d00dz an Samaria rmy, he sez, “Wut R teh lamez0r Jew-kitteh doin? Tehy can haz fixd wall? Tehy can maek snackrehfic to Ceiling Cat? Can tehy has dun N 1 day? Can stones frm lazord wall has lief agin?”

3 Tobiah teh Ammonite, who wuz @ hiz sied, sez, “Wut tehy R bldng—evun teh foxez climbin up oan it wud p0wnz0r taht wall!”

4 recv mssg, Ceiling Cat, 4 we R liek hateded on, liek srsly. Maek tehy trollz p0wnz0r tehm. Maek tehm p0wnz0rd by teh 4reners.

5 Doan p0wnz teh gult R laz0rd tehy sinz, 4 tehy haz trollzd teh buildy-kitteh, liek srsly.

6 So we maek liek haf teh wall, 4 all teh kitteh DO WANT teh wall.

7 Butt liek Sanballat, Tobiah, teh Arabs, teh Ammonites an teh d00dz of Ashdod hurded taht teh fixxins 2 Jeruslemz walls wuz liek doned an teh gapz wuz all goned, tehy wuz liek pizzd, liek srsly.

8 Tehy al pland 2 maek liek big raid v. Jeruslemz an liek tr0llz it.

9 Butt Jew-kitteh tlk 2 Ceiling Cat an maek liek soljure-kitteh l00k dayz an nitez.

10 Allso, teh d00dz in Judah sez, “teh buildy-kitteh iz sleepzy, liek srsly, doant haz chzburger, an 2 muchly rock an junk 2 maek wall.”

11 Allso bad-kitteh sez, “B4 tehy knowz ur seez us, well B in teh baze killin teihr d00dz an liek maek wall NOT BUILT.”

12 Teh Jew-kitteh nxt d00r cum an tell tehm, liek 10X, “d00dz, no retreet, tehy haz all teh base.”

13 So liek I maek sum sintry Bhind teh kitteh-flapz ov teh wall an @ teh weak linez, maek tehm watch kittehs, wif sw0rdz an speerz and b0wz.

14 L8ter I lookeded @ stuffz, I stoodz up an sez @ teh rich an poor kittehs, “Dont B skeered. 'member Ceiling Cat iz teh awesum, an pwnz bitchez 4 teh Jew-kitteh.”

15 When bad-kitteh here taht we haxx0r tehy raid an taht Ceiling Cat had pwnd it, we all go bak 2 maekn teh wall.

16 Frum taht dey, liek haf mah kitteh builded teh wall, an haf haz liek gunz n laz0rz n stuff. Teh offsirs haz liek all teh Judah-kitteh

17 who wuz blndng teh wall. All kitteh haz liek brikz n 1 paw and liek laz0rz n other,

18 an all buildy-kitteh haz liek gunz az tehy bld. Butt teh trumpet-kitteh hang wif me.

19 I sez @ teh rich an poor kittehs, “teh build stuffz iz liek, srsly h00g, an we'z liek way far apart.

20 Wehn I maek trumpet, cum hang wif us. Ceiling Cat p0wn0r bitchez 4 us!”

21 So we maek wall wif liek haf kitteh haz gunz, frum liek, srsly, 2 erly 2 liek way late.

22 @ taht tiem I also sez @ kittehs, “haz liek all kitteh hang n Jeruslemz @nite, wif laz0rz @ nite an bild wall n day.”

23 liek nun ov us wuz nekkid; haz laz0rz an stuffz even wehn drnken frm bowl.

Nehemiah 4
Books Chapters
← Previous Next → ← Previous Next →
Ezra Esther Nehemiah 3 Nehemiah 5
Personal tools