From LOLCat Bible Translation Project
Teh lordz case against israel
1 listen 2 wut teh lord sez: "stand up, plead ur case before teh mountins; Let teh hills hur wut u has 2 say.2 hear, o mountins, teh lordz accusashun; Listen, u evrlastin foundashuns ov teh urf. 4 da lord has case against his peeps; He iz lodgin charge against israel.3 "mah peeps, wut has i dun 2 u? Hao has i burdend u? Anzwr me.4 i brot u up out ov egypt An redeemd u frum teh land ov slavery. I sent mosez 2 lead u, Also aaron an miriam.5 mah peeps, remembr Wut balak king ov moab counseld An wut balaam son ov beor anzwerd. Remembr ur jerney frum shittim 2 gilgal, Dat u cud knoe teh righteous acts ov teh lord."6 wif wut shall i come before teh lord An bow down before teh exaltd Ceiling Cat? Shall i come before him wif burnd offerinz, Wif calvez yer old?7 will teh lord be pleezd wif thousandz ov rams, Wif 10 thousand rivvrs ov oil? Shall i offr mah firstborn 4 mah tranzgreshun, Teh fruit ov mah body 4 da sin ov mah soul?8 he has showded u, o kittehs, wut iz gud. An wut doez teh lord want from yuz? 2 be nais, 2 luv givin 2nd chansez An 2 walk humbly wif ur ceilin cat, srsly.
Israels guilt an punishment
9 listen! Teh lord iz callin 2 teh city An 2 fear ur naym iz wisdom "hed teh rod an teh wan hoo appointd it. [a]10 iz i still 2 forget, o wickd houz, Ur ill-gotten treasurez An teh short efah, [b] which iz accursd?11 shall i acquit man wif dishonest scalez, Wif bag ov false weights?12 her rich doodz r violent; Her peeps r liars An their tonguez speek deceitfully.13 therefore, i has begun 2 destroy u, 2 ruin u cuz ov ur sins.14 u will eat but not be satisfid; Ur stumuk will still be empty. [c] U will store up but save nothin, Cuz wut u save im gonna giv 2 teh sword.15 u will plant but not harvest; U will pres olivez but not use teh oil on yourselvez, U will crush grapez but not drink teh wine.16 u has observd teh statutez ov omri An all teh practicez ov ahabs houz, An u has followd their tradishuns. Therefore im gonna giv u ovar 2 ruin An ur peeps 2 derishun; U will bear teh scorn ov teh nashuns. [d] "
- a - Micah 6:9 teh meanin ov teh hebrew 4 dis line iz uncertain.
- b - Micah 6:10 an efah wuz dry measure.
- c - Micah 6:14 teh meanin ov teh hebrew 4 dis werd iz uncertain.
- d - Micah 6:16 septuagint; hebrew scorn due mah peeps
|← Previous||Next →||← Previous||Next →|
|Jonah||Nahum||Micah 5||Micah 7|