Matthew 6

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New Testament


Baby Jeezus tawt Charity

1 Ceiling Cat is watching you prostrate. pls to be prostrate wif prvcy, kthx.2 so when da ice cream man comes and humans are all leik give me a monie, no big deal k?3 is sekrit.4 Ceiling Cat is watching you compensate.

Baby Jeezus tawt about prayz

5 so j00 be all leik MCHammertime and pray jus 2 make it 2day and stuff.6 Ceiling Cat is watching you prostrate but u donut no he is tho.7 ur pray shood not be made of fail.8 Ceiling Cat knows what u donut hate.9 u pray leik dis:Ceiling Cat is so great.10 Cieling Cat can has the ceiling and da flur.11 I can has bred.12 i r sry n so r u.13 temptashuns will be all leik LOL we r leet but they lieded. rly. Foosball is teh debil. Ceiling Cat pwns all. He pwns teh ceiling and flur and walls too. Amen.

14 if u sais sry Ceiling Cat will be leik s'ok iz kewl.15 if u donut sez sry Ceiling Cat will pwn u.

Baby Jeezeus tawt about hungriez

16 if you want cheezburger plz to not be cryin. U can has invisible cheezeburger.17 if you want cheezeburger but can't has, get ur hair did.18 Ceiling Cat is watching you abstinate.

Monies in da Ceiling

19 donut hoard all ur monies. They be stealin ur monies!20 Hide da monies in da Ceiling. Ceiling Cat is watching you depos-ate.21 Ur moneies be safe wif Ceiling Cat.


22 if u can hear thru ur eyez you will be momentarily blinded and stuff.23 if ur eyez donut hear lazerz not to be helpings. Iz dark and skurry and stuffs.

Ceiling Cat an ur wurldy poseshuns
Matthew 6
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