Matthew 4

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Temptation Cat is Tempting

1 So Happy Cat taiked hisself 2 teh desert to hang with teh Basement Cat, so Basement Cat cud tri to pwn him2 N he et no cheezburgrz or cookies, even, fr 40 dayz n nites, srsly!3 Den Basement Cat wuz der and sayd “O hai, if ur teh Ceiling Cat’s kitlin, makes cheezburgrz outta da rocks kthx.”

4 Happy Cat sayd “NFW! Cheezburgrz am not da best, Ceiling Cat’s mews am best,” even tho he rly laikd cheezburgrz, laik, srsly.

5 Basement Cat wuz nt pwned, an tuk Happy Cat to top of Fridgerader.6 An sayd, “if ur teh Ceiling Cat’s kitlin, jump off and birdcats will cach u, n make u all cumfy n stuff, kthx.”

7 Happy Cat sayd "not is cool 2 try 2 pwn Ceiling Cat".

8 Basement Cat tuk Happy Cat in ur mounting, sittin on ur top, n showed Happy Cat ebry of roon in ebry of howse, srsly.9 N sayd, “All da base r belong 2 u if u lets me pwn u, kthx.”

10 But Happy Cat sayd, “STFU Basement Cat, R U DUM? Ceiling Cat am mai BFF cuz he am teh 1337!”

11 Den Basement Cat wuz pwnd, n birdcats cam frm Ceiling Cat an gave Happy Cat all teh cheezburgrz an cookiez an brushded his hairs.

Happy Cat begunz 2 preech, amirite?

12 Wen Happy Cat founded out dat John Baftis wuz in cat jail he made tracks fr Galaly13 An staid in Caper-Num by the waters bt he dint tak his bukkit an spayd.14 Cuz teh wize Ass-Eyess sayd15 “In all teh base, laik Zabalon n Nefarim n teh c n Jortan (yeh even KT Prys) n Galaly.16 Happy Cat will turn on teh liteswitch fr teh kittenz dat iz sittin in teh dark."

17 Dat iz wen Happy Cat strted 2 tell teh kittenz, “say yur sory fer bean bad kittehs cuz teh Cat Heaven am at hand btw. srsly.”

Teh callin of teh frist helper cats

18 Den Happy Cat bumpded into 2 kitlins uv same mudder hoo wuz cathcin fish n wuz called Siming AKA Peeter n Antroo AKA L'il Kitlin19 N Happy Cat sayd, “Comes wit me n u can catch pplz.”20 N cuz Happy Cat am teh 1337, dey wuz laik, “kthx.”

21 N den Happy Cat met Janes n udder John, hoo wuz vaedy reraxin on a bote wit dair tomcats, hoo wuz Zebedee frm teh Magic Roundabout.22 N dey also went wit Happy Cat.

Happy Cat heels teh sit

23 Happy Cat tuk hs crew roun Galaly, teechin in teh Ceiling Cat prace n sayn teh Good Mews n heelin teh sit.24 N many cats herd all bout his 1337ness an brot all der sit cats 2, laik teh crzy 1s n teh 1s dat Basement Cat had fiddlded wit, n Happy Cat heeled dem 2.25 An laik meellions an meellions of d00dz followed Happy Cat frm all ovr teh wrld.

Matthew 4
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