Leviticus 3

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Old Testament
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Cheezeburgerz for Makes Firend

1 And if dis be a cheezeburger of peace, for to say to Aaron's d00dz, liek, "Sorry for breakin ur internetz and skratchin up ur cowch," or tings of dat naycher, it better B awsum cheeseburger, d00d. Leik teh best k? Yoo've alreddy pissed us off wif ur assholery, dont mayk it wurse by bringin teh lame crap too. We's tite wif teh Ceiling Cat, he'll r00n ur day fer sher.2 And y'ull bring teh bag of cheezeburgerz it to the frunt d00r and taik one, and skweez teh cheezeburger jooces all ovur teh place liek a big fr00t.3 Tehn maik sher teh fire is good n' stokt, for teh kittehs to warm ther harbls. And bern that skwooshd burger, but Ceiling Cat DO NOT WANT no toemaytoes, iz gross kthx.4 Find out hoo orderd what frum teh cheezburgr man, so that them that dont leik teh pikkuls wont get teh pikkuls,5 And them that dont liek teh onyuns wont get teh onyuns, we can has now kthx yumyum.

6 And if teh donutz wif sprinkles an ExBockses be ur wai of sayin "Sorry for breakin ur internetz and skratchin up ur cowch," or moar of ur weerd pissin'-us-offness, then dont be a laim cheepsteak, they bettr B teh jely-fild and it bettr B teh TreeSiksy ExBock wif teh hedset for snipin ur d00dz an pwnin ur n00bs.7 And it bettr hav all teh peeces too, or ur goin to teh Best Buyz, dumy.8 Huk it up all nise an neet and frow all teh xtra parts around, speshly teh dum papurz an manyuls. Thems fer teh nurdz an n00bs, srsly.9 Hay! Pick teh sessum seeds offa mai cheezburger, thay get caugt in mai teefs kthx.10 BLECH! U want mai pikkuls? DO NOT WANT after all, sorythx.11 Is OK, d00d. We kewl now. Full of teh donutz and burgerz, seepy-seeps time now kthx.

12 D00d! Hoo braught teh gote? DO NOT WANT! He's eetin all teh burgerz and donutz! O NOES!13 U R teh suck, d00d. Kleen all dis gote-p00p up off teh flor and tayke ur ass bak to wair u caim frum. Srsly. Not funy.14 Kin u bleeve that guy? Bringin a gote in r cherch-tent-thing?15 I dont want mai pikkuls either. U eet them?16 Ew, this playce is trashd. We can has bonfire?

17 We gots all kindsa r00lz, d00d. Iz emportint for 2 followzing them. Cairful, or we'll mess up ur day. Ceiling Cat saiz so. Chek urself for so u dont reck urself. Kthxbai.

Leviticus 3
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