Leviticus 18

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Old Testament
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1 And ceiling cat sed, "Oh hai Mozus,"2 U sez unto teh kittehz uv Izreeul, u sez: "I, CEILING CAT, are teh CEILING CAT of dem!3 Dose guyz in teh eejipt, whar u wuz at, DO NOT WANT u for do dat. In teh Canaan, whar u be go to, DO NOT WANT u for do dat too. Kthxbai.4 Do whut I sez, cuz I am teh CEILING CAT, teh moar CEILING CAT.5 But u must do whut i sez cuz den u findz cheezburgers. I be teh CEILING CAT!

6 No can has teh secks wif teh fambily. I are teh CEILING CAT.

7 No can has teh surprise buttsecks wif ur daddy. No can has teh surprise buttsecks wif ur mommy, or dey wil b teh ghey.

8 No can has teh secks wif ur daddy's hoez, dats like teh buttsecks wif ur daddy.

9 No can has teh secks wif ur sister. No iz okai for teh beej. Srry.

10 No can has teh secks wif da kitteh uf ur kitteh.

11 No can has teh heej from teh cuzins. Srry.

12 No can has teh secks wif teh auntie.

13 No cans get teh beej wif auntie too. Srry.

14 No can has teh buttsecks wif teh unkl. He are teh goatse.

15 No can has beej from dawter in law. Well okai maibe sumtimes.

16 No can has teh secks wif ur broes hoes. Dats ur bro d00d!

17 No can has gangbang wif grandma and granddawter.

18 No can has gangbang wif ur hoes sisturz.

19 No can get ur harbl wetted when ur hoes has teh bluds in hur harbl.

20 No can has teh secks wif ur naiborz wife.

21 No can gif ur kitteh to teh fire of teh Molech. I are ceiling cat.

22 No can has mansex liek has ladysex. (hehe) Taht iz teh ghey.

23 No can has teh dogsecks. No can has secks wif teh horse. No can do teh goats. Srsly.

24 Guys, you no can has. Teh hoes is myne.25 If u teks mai hoes, I pwn u.26 Sooo, uz dun can has teh buttsecks, no can has teh dogsecks, and u can killz teh gheyz, k? DO NOT WANT teh ghey.27 I are on teh ceiling. I cans spunk on u.28 I spunkd on dose guys. Hehe.

29 Dey DO NOT WANT.30 OKAI? I are ceiling cat. I are watchin u masturbate.

Leviticus 18
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