From LOLCat Bible Translation Project
I Can Haz Canaan???
1 Nao thees r teh areas teh israelitez receivd as an inheritance in da land ov canaan, which eleazar teh priest, joshua son ov nun an teh headz ov teh tribal clanz ov israel allottd 2 them.2 They're inheritancez wuz assignd by lot 2 teh 9-an-a-half tribez, as teh lord had commandd thru mosez.3 Mosez had grantd teh 2-an-a-half tribez their inheritance east ov teh jordan but had not grantd teh levitez an inheritance among teh rest, 44 da sons ov josef had become 2 tribezâ€”manaseh an efraim. Teh levitez receivd no share ov teh land but only towns 2 liv in, wif pasturelandz 4 their flockz an herdz.5 So teh israelitez dividd teh land, jus as teh lord had commandd mosez.
I Can Haz Hebron???
6 Nao teh doodz ov judah approachd joshua at gilgal, an caleb son ov jefunneh teh kenizzite sed 2 him, "u knoe wut teh lord sed 2 mosez teh man ov ceilin cat at kadesh barnea bout u an me.7 i wuz forty yeers old when mosez teh servant ov teh lord sent me frum kadesh barnea 2 explore teh land. An i brought him bak report accordin 2 mah convicshuns,8 Butt mah brothers hoo went up wif me made teh hearts ov teh peeps melt wif fear. I, howevr, followd teh lord mah ceilin cat wholeheartedly.9 So on dat dai mosez swore 2 me, teh land on which ur feet has walkd will be ur inheritance an dat ov ur children forevr, cuz u has followd teh lord mah ceilin cat wholeheartedly. [a]10 "nao den, jus as teh lord promisd, he has kept me aliv 4 forty-5 yeers since teh tiem he sed dis 2 mosez, while israel movd bout in da desert. So her im todai, eighty-5 yeers old!11 Im still as strong todai as teh dai mosez sent me out; im jus as vigorous 2 go out 2 battle nao as i wuz den.12 Nao gimie dis hill country dat teh lord promisd me dat dai. U yourself herd den dat teh anakitez wuz thar an their citiez wuz large an fortifid, but, teh lord helpin me, im gonna driv them out jus as he sed."13 Den joshua blesd caleb son ov jefunneh an gaev him hebron as his inheritance.14 So hebron has belongd 2 caleb son ov jefunneh teh kenizzite evr since, cuz he followd teh lord, teh ceilin cat ov israel, wholeheartedly.15 (hebron usd 2 be calld kiriath arba aftr arba, hoo wuz teh greatest man among teh anakitez.) Den teh land had rest frum war.
Teh Cross Reference
- a - Joshua 14:9 - deuteronomy 1:36
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