Job 33

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Old Testament

1 Now U listenz to me, k?2 Iz gunna opn mouf, wurdz gunna com out.3 Wurdz com frum hart; lipz sez wut I noz. Srsly.4 CeilingCat mad me; bref of CeilingCat giv lyf.5 U answrz nao, k? Prepaer u!6 CeilingCat seez us teh same; Iz frum clay too. Srsly.7 Not be fraid, k? Paw not be hevy on u, k?8 But u sed dis:9 'Iz wifout Invisible Error; Iz gud kitteh.10 But Ceiling Cat sez iz bad kitteh; Iz his enemeh.11 He putz me in box; he watchz were I goes.'12 But I sez u iz rong, Ceiling Cat iz best kitteh.13 Why u complainz taht he no answrz?14 Ceiling Cat dos talks, even if kittehs cant heer.15 In dreem, when kittehs sleep,16 He sez skary fings in earz,17 To maek kitteh be gud kitteh,18 To saev kitteh soul frum basement, saev kitteh lief frum pointy fings.19 Or kitteh cud be rly sick,20 So kitteh duzn't even liek tuna.21 Kitteh getz rly thin.22 Kitteh soul go near basement, lief go to debils.23 But if kitteh has WingedCat to say hao to be gud kitteh,24 To say 'Kitteh not needz to go to basement;'25 Kitteh getz bettr. Yay!26 He praiz to Ceiling Cat; Ceiling Cat maek kitteh all bettr.27 Then he say 'I wuz bad kitteh, but didnt get bad stuf.28 Ceiling Cat savd me! Yay!'29 Ceiling Cat duz dis lotz-30 He savz kittehs, so kittehs can has cheezburgers.31 U listnz nao Job, k?32 If u wantz to say fings, say dem, cuz I wantz u to has cheezburger.33 If u no wantz to say fings, listen to Ceiling Cat, k?

Job 33
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