From LOLCat Bible Translation Project
1 "i made covenant wif mah eyez Not 2 look lustfully at gurl.2 4 wut iz manz lot frum ceilin cat aboov, His heritage frum teh almighty on high?3 Iz not ruin 4 da wickd, Disastr 4 dose hoo do wrong?4 Doez he not c mah ways An count mah evry step?5 "if i has walkd in falsehood Or mah foot has hurrid aftr deceit-6 Let ceilin cat weigh me in honest scalez An he will knoe dat im blameles-7 If mah steps has turnd frum teh path, If mah hart has been led by mah eyez, Or if mah hanz has been defild,8 Then cud others eat wut i has sown, An cud mah crops be uprootd.9 "if mah hart has been enticd by woman, Or if i has lurkd at mah neighbors door,10 Den cud mah wife grind anothr manz grain, An cud othr doodz sleep wif her.11 4 dat wud has been shameful, Sin 2 be judgd.12 It be fire dat burns 2 destrucshun [a] ; It wud has uprootd mah harvest.13 "if i has denid justice 2 mah menservants an maidservants When they had grievance against me,14 Wut will i doez when ceilin cat confronts me? Wut will i anzwr when calld 2 akownt?15 Did not he hoo made me in da womb mak them? Did not teh same wan form us both within r mothers?16 "if i has denid teh desirez ov teh poor Or let teh eyez ov teh widow grow weary,17 If i has kept mah bread 2 myself, Not sharin it wif teh fatherles-18 But frum mah youth i reard him as wud fathr, An frum mah birf i guidd teh widow-19 If i has seen anyone perishin 4 lack ov clothin, Or needy man without garment,20 An his hart did not bles me 4 warmin him wif teh fleece frum mah sheep,21 If i has raisd mah hand against teh fatherles, Knowin dat i had influence in court,22 Den let mah arm fall frum teh shouldr, Let it be brokd off at teh joint.23 4 i dreadd destrucshun frum ceilin cat, An 4 fear ov his splendor i cud not do such things.24 "if i has put mah trust in gold Or sed 2 pure gold, u r mah security,25 if i has rejoicd ovar mah great wealth, Teh fortune mah hanz had gaind,26 If i has regardd teh sun in itz radiance Or teh moon movin in splendor,27 So dat mah hart wuz secretly enticd An mah hand offerd them kis ov homage,28 Then thees also wud be sins 2 be judgd, 4 i wud has been unfaithful 2 ceilin cat on high.29 "if i has rejoicd at mah enemys misfortune Or gloatd ovar teh trouble dat came 2 him-30 I has not allowd mah mouth 2 sin By invokin curse against his life-31 If teh doodz ov mah haushold has nevr sed, Hoo has not had his fill ov jobs meat?-32 Butt no strangr had 2 spend teh nite in da street, 4 mah door wuz always open 2 teh travelr-33 If i has conceald mah sin as doodz do, [b] By hidin mah guilt in mah hart34 Cuz i so feard teh crowd An so dreadd teh contempt ov teh clanz Dat i kept silent an wud not go outside35 ("oh, dat i had someone 2 hear me! I sign nao mah defence - let teh almighty anzwr me; Let mah accusr put his indictment in writin.36 Surely i wud wear it on mah shouldr, I wud put it on liek crown.37 I wud giv him an akownt ov mah evry step; Liek prince i wud approach him.)-38 "if mah land criez out against me An all itz furrows r wet wif tears,39 If i has devourd itz yield without payment Or brokd teh spirit ov itz tenants,40 Den let briers come up instead ov wheat An weedz instead ov barley." Teh werdz ov job r endd.
- a - Job 31:12 hebrew abaddon
- b - Job 31:33 or as adam did
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