Jeremiah 32

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Old Testament
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Jeremyah bizes a lotta feeldzes!

1 Dis iz da wurd dat comded to da Jeremyah kitteh frum teh Ceiling Cat. It comded ten yeers aftur da King Kitteh, Zedukeeah (he were duh king-o-judah)

2 Teh war kittens o dah king kitteh o Baibeelon were doin teh beseejin oh dah holiez boxes, jeruslm. Jeremyah wuzz dah futur seer (not dah bullfrog lol!) n he wuzz made to sit in dah lawnz o dah securty manz iin dah palaz o judah. srsly.

3 Now, zedukeeah, dah rulah kitteh o judah maded him sit der n saiz, "what wit yur futur seen?!? SRSLY! u be saiz, 'dis iz whut Ceiling Cat saiz: I r gonna giv dis box to dah rulah kitteh o baibeelon n he gonna cap yur flag!

4"'Zedukeeah, u iz nut gonna be goin no werz, u gonna sai hai to dah utter rullah kitteh, n he gon seez u wit hiz ayz!

5"'teh Ceiling Cat saiz, he gon takded u to dah baibeelon, n u gon stay der wit him till ai deel wit him, jus go, srsly.'"

6 Jeremyah kitteh sai, "Hay! B kewl! dah wurd o teh Ceiling Cat cameded to meh!:

7 "Haynamel, sun o shahlum, ur cuzzin iz comded to u n sai, 'purchasez mah feeldz! cauz itz yur dootiz! fyi!' ai knowed day dis wuz dah werd o Teh Ceiling Cat;

8 So mah cousin Haynamel camed 2 meh in da cort ov teh prizin accordin 2 teh werd o Teh Ceiling Cat, an sed to meh, buy mah feeldz, dat iz in anathoth, which iz in da cuntry ov Binjahmin: 4 da rite of inheritence iz urz, an teh redempshun iz urz; buy it 4 u and ur friends. Den ai knew dat dis wuz dah werd o Teh Ceiling Cat an stuffs.

9 An ai botted teh feeldz frum mah cuzzin Haynamel, an givved him teh munny, seventeen shiny things.


Jeremiah 32
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