Hebrews 2

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Pai Atenshun Kittehs!

1 Wee kittehs mus pai atenshun tah wat wee has hurdz so wee no dwiftz awai.2 Fur if dah mesige sed by dem birdcats was bindin, an evawee invisible error reseeved its jus punishment,3 how canz wee escaep if we no lisen tah dis gwate salvashun? Dis salvashun wich was firs anownced by dah Ceiling Cat, was cunfirmd tah us kittehs by dose kittehs hoo hurd him.4 Ceiling Cat allso testifyed tah it by syns, wundrs and varius meerakles, and cheezburgahs of dah Hover Cat givn acordin tah himz will.

Jebus Maid Liek Us Kittehs!

5 No iz tah birdcats dat Jebus haz maid da Urf tah come, bowt witch wee bee speeking of.6 Butt der iz ah playce wear sumone haz testifeyed: "Watz da man dat yu bee minefull of, dee sun oh man dat yu caer fur himz?7 Yu madz hims ah fiew furbaws lowah dan dem birdcats; yu cround himz wit da gloary an honah8 an puh evewifin undah himz feet." Inn puhin evahwefin undah hims, dah Ceiling Cat lef nofing dat iz not lyeible tah himz. Yets aht da pwesent wee do nots see dat evahwefin iz lyeible tah himz.9 Butt wee seez Jebus, hoo waz maid ah fiew furbaws lowah dan dem birdcats, naoh izd crouned wif da gloary an honah kaz him haz sufahed def, so dat by dah cheezburgahs of dah Ceiling Cat himz mites tastd def fuh al us kittehs!10 Inn bwingen manee kittehs tah gloary, its watz fitin dat Ceiling Cat, who haz maids evahweefi, shuld purrfekt salfaeshun bie sufahwen.11 Dee kittehs dat maek dem kittehs holey an dah kittehs dat arr maid holey arr inz dah saem famawee. Soo Jebus no iz ashaimd tah call dem bwoatas.12 Him sayzes, "Ai willz say my naim tah mi kittehs; en dah pwescense of dah kittehs ai wilz sing yuz prayzes."13 An agan, "Ai willz puts my twast en hims." An agan himz says, "Hee am ai, an dah kittehs Ceiling Cat haz given tah mee."14 Sinz dah kittehs haf furr n taylz, dey mae awso shware en beein kittehs so dat bi der defs dey mae destwoy dah Basement Cat hoo howdz dah powah of def15 an fwee dah kittehs hoo arr en caiges bi der feerz of def.16 Foe hims no hewps dah birdcats, buh Abraham's kittehs.17 Caz of dis himz hads tah bee maid liek us kittehs en evahwee way, so dats hims may bee ah faiful kitteh tah Ceiling Cat, an dat himz mite atoan fur dee invisible errors of dah kittehs.18 Caz him himzself sufahd wen himz wah temptaed, hims iz abah tah helpz dose hoo arr bein temptaed. Srsly!

Hebrews 2
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