Genesis 5

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Old Testament
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1 Dis iz teh book ov teh generashuns ov adam. in da dai dat Ceiling Cat creatd visible man, in da likenes ov Ceiling Cat he made him but he didnt gaev him any furz liek teh moocows so he wud has 2 wear cloths & evry1 knoes cats dont liek to wear cloths so that wuz 1 mor mean thing Ceiling Cat did 2 teh peepz.

2 male & female creatd he them, & blesd them, & calld their naim adam, in da dai when they were creatd. teh peeps who rited this bibel wantz to b raely shur u knows ther naim.

3 & adam livd 100 & 30 yeers, & begat son in his own likenes, aftr his image; & calld his name seth:

4 & teh dais ov adam aftr he begat seth were 800 yeers: & he begat lots ov kidz.

5 & all teh dais dat adam livd were 900 & 30 yeers: & he got ded.

6 & seth livd 100 & 5 yeers, & begat enosh:

7 & seth livd aftr he begat enosh 800 & 7 yeers, & begat lots ov kidz:

8 & all teh dais ov seth were 900 & 12 yeers: & he got ded.

9 & enosh livd ninety yeers, & begat kenan.

10 & enosh livd aftr he begat kenan 800 & 15 yeers, & begat lots ov kidz:

11 & all teh dais ov enosh were 900 & 5 yeers: & he got ded.

12 & kenan livd 70 yeers, & begat mahalalel:

13 & kenan livd aftr he begat mahalalel 800 & 40 yeers, & begat lots ov kidz:

14 & all teh dais ov kenan were 900 & 10 yeers: & he got ded.

15 & mahalalel livd 60 & 5 yeers, & begat jard:

16 & mahalalel livd aftr he begat jard 800 & 30 yeers, & begat lots ov kidz:

17 & all teh dais ov mahalalel were 800 ninety & 5 yeers: & he got ded.

18 & jard livd 100 & 60 & 2 yeers, & begat enoch:

19 & jard livd aftr he begat enoch 800 yeers, & begat lots ov kidz:

20 & all teh dais ov jard were 900 & 60 & 2 yeers: & he got ded.

21 & enoch livd 60 & 5 yeers, & begat methuselah:

22 & enoch walkd wif Ceiling Cat aftr he begat methuselah 300 yeers, & begat lots ov kidz:

23 & all teh dais ov enoch were 300 & 60 & 5 yeers:

24 & enoch hung out wif Ceiling Cat alot & he didnt gets ded liek evry1 els. he flyed up in invisible airplane 2 b wif Ceiling Cat 4evr.

25 & methuselah livd 100 & 80 & 7 yeers, & begat lamech:

26 & methuselah livd aftr he begat lamech 700 & 80 & 2 yeers, & begat lots ov kidz.

27 & all teh dais ov methuselah were 900 & 60 & 9 yeers: & he got ded.

28 & lamech livd 100 & 80 & 2 yeers, & begat son:

29 & he calld his name noah, sayin, dis same shall comfort us in r werk & in da toil ov r hanz, which cometh because ov teh ground which Ceiling Cat hath cursd.

30 & lamech livd aftr he begat noah 500 & 90 & 5 yeers, & begat lots ov kidz:

31 & all teh dais ov lamech were 700 & 70 & 7 yeers: & he got ded.

32 & noah wuz 500 yeers old: & noah begat shem & ham who wuz not lunch meet lol & japheth.




Genesis 5
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