Ezekiel 30

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Old Testament
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Sad Day For Teh Ejipt

1 Dis is messag dat cum to meh frum ceiling cat. 2 He sez to meh "Hai kitteh! Tell de udder kittehs dat I, de most awsum ceiling cat who rockz so much sez diz. kthnxbai."

"Cry n moans and howl lotz
cuz of dat day."
3 Cuz dat reali bad day iz pretty much almos goin to b hear.
It iz day of ceiling cat. srsly.
It iz day of leik cloudz and doom n other bad stufz.
All teh nationz wil hav teh sadness.
4 A rolled-up newspapr will hit teh ejipt!
All teh kitteh who get killd will cuvr teh groun.
An dere cheezburgr will getz taken.
And all dere stuffs will be destroied. srsly.
Ethopia, well, it doan look gud for dem, either.
5 Ethopia, Lyba, Lydiah, n all Arabiah
N all teh kitteh who leiks dem
will be so destroied in teh war.
6 Cuz dis is wut ceiling cat sez
All of ejipts frends will fall down.
N all of her pride and powr n stuf will endz.
Everywun, everywhere will get hit by teh newspapr.
sez teh awsum ceiling cat.
7 Egipt will not haz nething.
None of teh nashuns by Egipt will haz nething, eithr.
All of teh citis wil b leik so ruind.
N all teh citis nex to dem, too.
8 Den dey wil all no dat i am mihty ceiling cat. ya srsly.
Wen I set egipt on teh firezzz!
N killd all her frends.
9 Den I wil send messanjers on kewl boatz.
Dey wil mak teh Ethipans haz fearz n b scared.
Dey will haz a grate panic. srsly.
On dat day wen Egipt is leik so destroied.
Jus watch!
Is coming.
10 Cuz dis is wut ceiling cat sez
Wit powr of Kingkitteh Neb of Babblon
I will destroi egipts stuffz!
11 He and his meanest fighterkittehs
wil b sent to ruin teh landz.
Dey will makez teh war agais egipt. srsly.
Until ded egiptkittehs cuvr teh ground.
12 Ya I will takez all der watr
n sellz der land to wickd kittehs!
I am so goin to destroi egipt n all der cheezbrgrs!
by teh hands of ppl who livez far away.
Yep, I, teh awsum ceiling cat haz speaked.
Ezekiel 30
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