From LOLCat Bible Translation Project
Ketteh in ur soul doing what ketteh should
1 An teh wurd of teh Ceiling Cat happenz to me, he sez, I be in ur computr typin up sum articles for teh house I am teh ceiling 4, en dis iz what i tipe:2 wtf does dis mean, "Daddies haf eated yur grapes en de kettehs have got sharp toothed"3 it maked no cents, so no have sayed it evr agen, k?4 Ceiling Cat is in ur life, doing what ever I want, k?5 If ketteh is good ketteh, e iz good, k?6 good ketteh means ketteh not have eaten sofa, an ketteh not have "penis go where? in grl ketteh who gots period" srsly dats gross, don do it.7 an good kettehs do not have silvar dizez uv utter kettehs, dey need em to eated out of.8 do not have eated anytin teh Basement Cat sayed 2 eated9 4 if you do not u will nap en dah ceiling with me, so sayed Ceiling Cat.10 if penis goes where? makes a taker ov utter kettehs silvar dizez, or utter stuffs11 (doh da daddie does not) a bebea ketteh who eaten sofa an ketteh who have penis go where? ing rl ketteh who gots period,12 an takes teh utter kettehs silvar dizez (even dah gawlden uns) en utter bad stuffs13 dis bad ketteh Ceiling Cat will pwn, even though bad ketteh has good praktiz with katana. iz his own falts btw.14 On dah utter paw, if a babea ketteh is not like iz bad ketteh daddie15 en duz not eated sofaz like iz daddie, nor gross penis go where? stuffs16 en gives ketteh food 2 dah kettehz who wants deh ketteh food17 en duz not lizen 2 da Basement Cat (hez bad ketteh srsly)18 Only da daddie will be kilt for dah errors uv da daddie, en only da babea ketteh will be kilt for dah errors uv da babea ketteh.19 All dah kettehs talked "why ez did so?" en dah anzer iz "cuz Ceiling Cat saz so"20 Only with dah errors is u kilt ketteh falled daen in 2 Basement wet teh Basement Cat.21 But if teh ketteh ez a good ketteh, he not have falled daen in 2 Basement, more cheeseburgrz dat way 4 u btw.22 If you good kettehs be good Ceiling Cat will not watch you as you error, as if never happen, k?23 Do I haved fun wit kilt bad kettehs sayed Ceiling Cat, or do I haved fun wit good ketteh wit not have kilted?24 Utter is also troo, if you good kettehs be bad Ceiling Cat will watch you as you error, en u have no cheeseburgr, k?25 u say "Ceiling Cat wai no fare!" heer now o house I protek frum deh rain, ez my wai no fare, or ez your wai no fare?26 U g2g 2 Basement if Ceiling Cat saz so btw.27 bad ketteh hoo make good r good kettehs now en good kettehs no kilt dem, en good ketteh have da life.28 en dats why good kettehs r not have kilted, cuz dey r good kettehs now, k?29 en yet u sayed again "Ceiling Cat wai no fare!"30 en dah Ceiling Cat, who have all dah cheeseburgerz sayed en reli "kettehs, wai u soe repetitif?"
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