From LOLCat Bible Translation Project
1 Tese r de promises dat Moses maded wit teh Israelitas wen Ceiling Cat sed to, & it go wiv teh promises at Horeb.
2 Moses sez: U was in Ejip watchin Ceiling Cat do bad stufz to faroh & his kittehs.
3 U saw da pruf wiv ur eyes, signs of great trials & maveluz trix
4 But still U has blind, U has def, U has stupid.
5 40 irz in sendz, ur shuuz & ur robez lasted liek magic!
6 An U liveded wivout cheezburger & graep coke, so U knows I am Ceiling Cat.
7 Diz place, Sihon pwner uv Heshbon & Og pwner Bashan, wil chalege us an wil b srved.
8 Tuk ther place an giv 2 Rubenitas, Gaditas, but just halv 2 Manassitas k? lol.
9 $$ u wil got
10 Ceiling Cat, boz uv al homies
11 Boz uv ltl d00dz, wivs, aliens, loggers & flooders
12 2 B Ceiling Cat homie, u has 2 swear
13 Swear by oldz d00dz Abrams, Isaks e Jacobz
14 Swear again. lolz
15 But stand upz, k?
16 Piramids r ours now k?
17 Piramids ppl hav false Ceiling animal munsters wiv them, boo
18 Dun pray 2 oda Ceiling animalz k? Tiz poizon us.
19 Now letz get drunk, k?
20 Ceiling Cat dun forgiv u k?
21 Bad Cat seprate, goes to Ceiling animal munsters ppl's place, plage goes there
22 Ltl d00dz got plages 2
23 Bad as Gomorra place
24 Evrbody is like WFT?
25 U is like: U lie wiv Ceiling Cat swear
26 Bad Ceiling Cat wiv lirz place k?
27 Vry Bad
28 Wut Ceiling Cat hasnt sed iz secrts. Ceiling Cat has al secrts fur him only k? Da rest iz fur cats an kitten. oBey Ceiling Cat!
29 Teh secrt stufz are belongin to Ceiling Cat,but teh stufz that are reveald are belonging to teh kittehs and to thair kittehs forevah, that we might follow teh words of tis rool.
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