1 Samuel 19

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Old Testament
Saul Almost PWNS David.... Almost

1 saul told his son jonathan an all teh attendants 2 kill david. But jonathan wuz vry fond ov david2 an warnd him, "mah fathr saul iz lookin 4 chance 2 kill u. Be on ur guard 2morrow mornin; go into hidin an stay thar.3 im gonna go out an stand wif mah fathr in da field wer u r. Ill speek 2 him bout u an will tell u wut i find out."4 jonathan spoke well ov david 2 saul his fathr an sed 2 him, "let not teh king do wrong 2 his servant david; he has not wrongd u, an wut he has dun has benefitd u greatly.5 he took his life in his hanz when he killd teh filistine. Teh lord won great victory 4 all israel, an u saw it an wuz glad. Y den wud u do wrong 2 an innosent man liek david by killin him 4 no reason?"6 saul listend 2 jonathan an took dis oath: "as surely as teh lord livez, david will not be put 2 death."7 so jonathan calld david an told him teh whole conversashun. He brought him 2 saul, an david wuz wif saul as before.

8 once moar war broke out, an david went out an fought teh filistinez. He struck them wif such force dat they fld before him.9 but an evil [a] spirit frum teh lord came upon saul as he wuz sittin in his houz wif his spear in his hand. While david wuz playin teh harp,10 saul trid 2 pin him 2 teh wall wif his spear, but david eludd him as saul droov teh spear into teh wall. Dat nite david made gud his escape.11 saul sent doodz 2 davidz houz 2 watch it an 2 kill him in da mornin. But michal, davidz wife, warnd him, "if u doan run 4 ur life tonite, 2morrow ull be killd."12 so michal let david down thru window, an he fld an escapd.13 den michal took an idol [b] an laid it on teh bed, coverin it wif garment an puttin sum goats hair at teh head.

14 when saul sent teh doodz 2 capchur david, michal sed, "he iz ill."15 den saul sent teh doodz bak 2 c david an told them, "brin him up 2 me in his bed so dat i cud kill him."16 but when teh doodz enterd, thar wuz teh idol in da bed, an at teh head wuz sum goats hair.17 saul sed 2 michal, "y u deceiv me liek dis an send mah enemy away so dat he escapd?" Michal told him, "he sed 2 me, let me git away. Y shud i kill u? "18 when david had fld an made his escape, he went 2 samuel at ramah an told him all dat saul had dun 2 him. Den he an samuel went 2 naioth an stayd thar.

{{|19=werd came 2 saul: "david iz in naioth at ramah"; |20=so he sent doodz 2 capchur him. But when they saw group ov profets profesyin, wif samuel standin thar as their leadr, teh spirit ov ceilin cat came upon sauls doodz an they also profesid. |21=saul wuz told bout it, an he sent moar doodz, an they profesid 2. Saul sent doodz third tiem, an they also profesid. |22=finally, he him left 4 ramah an went 2 teh great cistern at secu. An he askd, "wer r samuel an david?" "ovar in naioth at ramah," they sed. |23=so saul went 2 naioth at ramah. But teh spirit ov ceilin cat came even upon him, an he walkd along profesyin til he came 2 naioth. |24=he strippd off his robez an also profesid in samuels presence. He lay dat wai all dat dai an nite. Dis ar teh y peeps say, "iz saul also among teh profets?" }}

Teh Footnotez
  • a - 1 samuel 19:9 or injurious
  • b - 1 samuel 19:13 hebrew terafim ; also in verse 16
1 Samuel 19
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