1 Peter 3

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1 Teh ladiez should listen to their huzbanz, cuz if teh gai messes up, his wiv is leik is ok I has it, n leave teh basement2 when they see whut u did there.3 Don’t have win on just the outside,4 let it be win on the inside to Ceiling Cat.5 Cuz it was leik this a long tiem ago6 when Sarah listened to Abraham and u can b leik her.

7 Huzbanz, be good to your wiv, cuz Ceiling Cat leiks this, so he not ignoer ur meowz.

8 K, and has hugs tiem wit every19 and give cookies and chzbururz to ppl who steal ur bukkit so Ceiling Cat gives u cookies and chzburgurz.10 Cuz “he who has cookie, and chzburgurz and win."11 Let him say do not want to fail and spread win12 cuz Ceiling Cat sees wut u did there and leiks it, but sez do not want fail”

13 And who will steal ur bukkit if u leik Ceiling Cat?14 But even if some stuff is teh sux, u can has chzburgurz from Ceiling Cat.15 Make sure that if ppl r leik wtf? U tell them bout Ceiling Cat16 and remember Ceiling Cat gives u cookies and chzburgurz if they r like “lol, o rly? U sux.”17 But its better to b told u sux and leik Ceiling Cat, cuz he has chzburgurz and win.

18 Jeebus was once in the same spot, srsly,19 but he went and sed “hai, Ceiling Cat pwns” to prizners20 who were leik the ppl who weren’t cool leik Noah and teh ppl on his boat.21 Teh water of baptizim saves us and gives us chance for chzburgurz thru Jeebus22 who went to hang wit Ceiling Cat.

1 Peter 3
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